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Oral bac anglais Myths and heroes

Bonjour!!
Pourriez-vous me donner votre avis sur ma synthèse sur la notion "Mythes et Héros", et m'aider à corriger les fautes de langue, s'il vous plait? Merci d'avance!!
Juste en information, je me suis basée sur mes cours et sur un site internet pour avoir des informations plus précises : Lien internet
- MYTHS AND HEROES -
I'm going to talk about «myths and heroes». First, I want to give a definition af a hero : a hero can be a mythological figure, a person who is admired for his or her achievements, a superhero or mabye a role model or an icon. A hero can be a patriotic or a national hero such as a sportsman, a politican, a human rights defender. Besides a hero can be fictitious : it's the case for superheroes. In English class, we studied three national heroes who became model for the world : Gandhi, Martin Luther King and Nelson Mendela. We can wonder how these leader of national movements have become heroes for people around the world. For his purpose, I'm going to present these three personnalities.
First, Gandhi is the emblematic figure of the independance of India. He was the peeminent leader of Indian nationalism. He was born an October the 2nd 1869. Gandhi studied law in Great Britain, in London. His first employed non-violent civil desobedience as an expriate lawyer in South Africa, in the resident Indian community's struggle for civil rights. He organized meeting, demonstration. He resisted the police. This shows his determination : he sacrified his own body. In 1914, Gandhi returned to India. He became leader of the Indian National Congress. He led national compaigns for alleviating poverty, expanding women's right, putting an end to caste discrimination. His ultimate objective was self-rule for India. In 1930, he led a landmark 320km march to the seo in oder to collect salt in symbolic defiance of the government monopoly. He wanted to challenge the Empire and provoke it, expecting a reaction from its part. Gandhi gathered people on the way : many people joined him. This demonstration was severly repressed : the international community acclaimed Gandhi. It's with this march that he became a hero. His personnality made a great impact on people thanks to his human qualities : modest, humble, considering every body on an equal foot... He embodies the non-violent desobedience and the peace in the world. Gandhi's personnality make him a hero !
Contrary to Gandhi, Martin Luther King used his charisma. He delivered many speeches. The most famous is the speech that he delivered on August 28th , 1963, in Washington, in front of the statue of Lincoln, after a long and exhausting protest march. It was «I have a dream». Over one million people, mostly blacks, from all walks of life and from many different states, were gathered their to claim equality between balck and white people. During his speech, he made gestures. He convinced his audience with his intonation. He was a symbol of the Civil Rights movement in the United States. He was a great apostle of the equality and the non-violence. Martin Luther King became a hero with the powerful of speeches in front of immense crowd !
Finally, a third man became a hero by an other way. It's Nelson Mandela. He was a lawyer. He became increasingly involved with the African National Congress (ANC), a multi-racial nationalist movement that it tried to bring about political change in South Africa. By the late 1950s, the government harded the discriminations : that's why, the ANC decided to move in a more radical direction. In March 1960, 69 black anti-apartheid demonstrators were killed by the police. The government banned the ANC. Consequently Mandela founded the military section of the ANC which it called «the spear of the Nation». He was arrested on August 5th , 1962, and he went on a trial. He was sentenced to life imprisonment. He was held in Robben Island prison, of the coast of Cape Town. During his year in prison, he became on international symbol of resistance to Apartheid. In 1990, the South African government responded to internal and international pressure and released Mandela. The government autorized the ANC. He was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize in 1993. Mandela was elected its first black president in 1994 after the first multi-racial election. Mandela is a hero by his imprisonment and with his intelligence. Nelson Mandela is one of the most inspiring figures of the 20th century.
To conclude, we can say that these three men became heroes by different ways : non-violence and humans qualities for Gandhi ; famous speeches for Martin Luther King and resistance to an oppressive regime for Nelson Mandela. I consider them like heroes !!

Sagot :

Santos2
- MYTHS AND HEROES -
I'm going to talk about "myths and heroes". First, I want to give the definition of a hero: a hero can be a mythological figure, a person who is admired for his or her achievements, a superhero or maybe a role model or an icon. A hero can be a patriotic or a national hero such as a sportsman, a politician, a human rights defender. Besides, a hero can be fictitious character : it's the case for superheroes. In English class, we studied three national heroes who became role models for the world : Gandhi, Martin Luther King and Nelson Mandela. We can ask ourselves how these leader of national movements managed to become heroes for people all around the world. For this purpose, I'm going to present these three personalities. 
First, Gandhi is the emblematic figure of the independence of India. He was the preeminent leader of Indian nationalism. He was born on October the 2nd 1869. Gandhi studied law in Great Britain, in London. He first employed his non-violent civil disobedience as an expiate lawyer in South Africa, in the resident Indian community's struggle for civil rights. He organized meetings and demonstrations. He resisted the police. This shows his determination : he sacrificed his own body. In 1914, Gandhi returned to India (very short broken sentences..,join them to make better sentences using conjunctions). He became leader of the Indian National Congress. He led national campaigns for alleviating poverty, expanding women's right, putting an end to caste discrimination. His ultimate objective was self-rule for India. In 1930, he led a landmark 320 km march to the sea in order  to collect salt in symbolic defiance of the government's monopoly. He wanted to challenge the Empire and provoke it, expecting a reaction from its part. Gandhi gathered people on the way : many people joined him. This demonstration was severely repressed : the international community acclaimed Gandhi. It's with this march that he became a hero. His personality made a great impact on people thanks to his human qualities : modest, humble, considering every body on an equal foot... He embodies the non-violent disobedience and the peace in the world. Gandhi's personality made him a hero !
Contrary to Gandhi, Martin Luther King used his charisma. He delivered many speeches. The most famous of is the speech that he delivered on August 28th , 1963, in Washington, in front of the statue of Lincoln, after a long and exhausting protest march, is the "I have a dream" speech. Over one million people, mostly blacks, from all walks of life and from many different states, were gathered their to claim equality between Black and White people. During his speech, he made gestures. He convinced his audience with his intonation. He was the symbol of the Civil Rights movement in the United States. He was a great apostle of the equality and the non-violence. Martin Luther King became a hero with the powerful speeches he made in front of immense crowd !
Finally, a third man became a hero by an other way; It's Nelson Mandela. He was a lawyer. He became increasingly involved with the African National Congress (ANC), a multi-racial nationalist movement that tried to bring about political change in South Africa. By the late 1950s, the government intensified the discrimination and that is what prompted  the ANC to move in a more radical direction. In March 1960, 69 black anti-apartheid demonstrators were killed by the police and the government banned the ANC. Consequently, Mandela founded the military section of the ANC which it called "the spear of the Nation". He was arrested on August 5th , 1962, and he went on to a trial. He was sentenced to life imprisonment. He was held in Robben Island prison, off the coast of Cape Town. During his years in prison, he became an international symbol of resistance to Apartheid. In 1990, the South African government responded to internal and international pressure and released Mandela. The government authorized the ANC. He was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize in 1993. Mandela was then elected as the first black president in 1994 after the first multi-racial election. Mandela became a hero by his imprisonment and with his intelligence. Nelson Mandela is one of the most inspiring figures of the 20th century.
To conclude, we can say that these three men became heroes by different ways : non-violence and humans qualities for Gandhi ; famous speeches for Martin Luther King and resistance to an oppressive regime for Nelson Mandela. I consider them heroes !!
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