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Missi1alatr0omanonlo
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Oral bac anglais - notion Espaces et échanges

Bonjour,
est-ce que quelqu'un pourrait m'aider au niveau de l'orthographe et de la conjugaison de mon texte s'il vous plait?
Merci pour vos réponses.
I am going to talk about the notion spaces and exchange. This notion deals with the geographical and symbolic areas that all society occupy and the interactions between men and different societies. Our world is built on the exploration and conquest of new spaces. The different cultural, economic, sociological and language interactions have shaped and characterised our modern-day world.
So does the american dream is a real?
So, firstly we will see that yes the american dream was a reality and in the secondly we will see that the American dream become a nightmare for some people.
When the people immigrate in the USA, they want to found the American dream. The phrase « American dream» was coined by James Truslow in his book «The epic of America». The term American dream» is used in many ways, but it essentially is an idea that suggests that anyone in the US can succeed through hard work and has the potential to lead a happy, successful life. But this term is complicated because a dream for someone isn’t necessarily a dreams for others.
In class, we have see a cartoon who talk about the people who arriving on the boat this people was a pilgrims. Originally from England, they fled religious persecution. They wished to be free to practise whatever religion they chose. They decided to leave Europe and start a new life in the new world. They sailed across the Atlantic Ocean aboard the Mayflower and arrived at Plymouth Rock.
They wanted to built a new society, a very moral society where everyone would to contribute to make life better.
In class we can see an other document, this document was a text who is named «Brooklyn» is written by Colm Toibin in 2009, this text talks about the story of two Irish woman who are on a boat for go to Eillis Island. This woman they go to the USA to escape misery because they came from Irish and in this country they are the famine.
But this immigration to found the American dream in the USA was few times a nightmare.
The cartoon, that I have told you, show us anoter aspect . Indeed with this cartoon the author’s had some intent. He makes the ironic comparison between the arrival on the Pilgrims and the present day issue of immigration in the USA. When the pilgrims arrived at Plymouth Rock, the Indians help them. If the Indians had not helped them, they would have starved. Unfortunately, the Indians were not paid in return for their kidness since the settlers soon came into conflict with them over land and culture. They fled because they were persecuted but came to reproduce the same pattern with the Native Americans. Nowadays, the American governement spends millions of dollars a year trying to protect its borders. Contrary to the indians, Americans are desperate to keep people out.
In Eillis Island many family was broken because when a member of family was seek they can’t go in the USA and he must return to his country moreover many peoples die during the travel for the USA because they are a lot of immigrant who want to go to in the USA so if one of them was seek he can give is virus to an other and make an epidemy they life in horrible condition.
In conclusion, I could say that the American dream was reel because he gives a lot of esperence to someone and make believe into a better «world» where many peoples can be rich and live a life succesfull but when we go in the USA nothing is easy and before they can realize their American Dream they meet many barrier and often the american dream is a lie , moreover the usa is a country who is build on many deads an pain.

Sagot :

Santos2
I am going to talk about the notion spaces and exchange. This notion deals with the geographical and symbolic areas that all society occupy and the interactions between men and different societies. Our world is built on the exploration and conquest of new spaces. The different cultural, economic, sociological and language interactions have shaped and characterized our modern-day world. 
So is the american dream real?
So, firstly (first is a better form) we will see that, yes, the american dream was a reality and in the second part we will see that the American dream has become a nightmare for some people.
When people immigrate to the USA, they want to find the American dream. The phrase "American dream" was coined by James Truslow in his book "The epic of America". The term "American dream" is used in many ways, but it essentially is an idea that suggests that anyone in the US can succeed through hard work and has the potential to lead a happy, successful life. But this term is complicated because a dream for someone isn’t necessarily a dreams for others. 
In class, we saw a cartoon which talks about people arriving in America in a boat: the pilgrims. Originally from England, they fled religious persecution. They wished to be free to practice whatever religion they chose. They decided to leave Europe and start a new life in the new world. They sailed across the Atlantic Ocean aboard the Mayflower and arrived at Plymouth Rock.
They wanted to built a new society, a very moral society where everyone would contribute in making life better. 
In class we looked at another document, this document was a text named "Brooklyn"  written by Colm Toibin in 2009.This text talks about the story of two Irish women who are on a boat for go to Eillis Island. These women travel to the USA to escape misery because they came from Ireland where there was famine.
But this journey to find the "American dream" in the USA turned out to be more than a nightmare.
The cartoon, that I have told you, shows us another aspect . Indeed with this cartoon the author’s had some intent. He makes the ironic comparison between the arrival of the Pilgrims and the present day issue of immigration in the USA. When the pilgrims arrived at Plymouth Rock, the Indians helped them. If the Indians had not helped them, they would have starved. Unfortunately, the Indians were not paid in return for their kindness, since the settlers soon came into conflict with them over land and culture. They fled because they were persecuted but came to reproduce the same pattern with the Native Americans. Nowadays, the American government spends millions of dollars a year trying to protect its borders. Contrary to the indians, Americans are desperate to keep people out.
In Ellis Island many families were broken because when a member of family was seek they can’t go in the USA and he must return to his country. Moreover many people die during the travel to the USA because they are many immigrants who try to get in to the USA so if one of them was sick he can give is virus to an other and make an epidemy they life in horrible condition. (the immigrants were many hence they could easily transmit the virus among themselves)
In conclusion, I could say that the American dream was real because it gives a lot of esperence to someone and makes them believe in better "world" where many anyone can be rich and live successful life. But when they get into the USA nothing is easy and before they can realize their American Dream they meet many barriers and often the American dream is a lie. Moreover, the USA is a country which was built on many deaths an pain. (very long sentences that go into other points without breaks)
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