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Destiny
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Bonjour. J'avais une rédaction sur les fantômes et les châteaux à faire, en anglais.
Voici, ce que j'ai fait. Ce sera vraiment gentil de me corriger. Surtout les verbes.

Cursed Castle.

2016.

The ghost of the Cursed Castle has reappeared. Indeed, the corpse of a young boy, called Ezra has been found at the foot of this haunted castle. Like all the other boys, before him, he « fell » from the summit of this fortress. Which is unlikely, since nobody ventures there. Some people say that a ghost roams there, and others think rather of suicides.
Me, I was neutral. Until the day, one of my friends challenged me to visit the famous Cursed Castle. As all the boys, I wanted to prove my courage and my bravery to my friends. And I accepted the challenge, with determination.
When I arrived in front of the castle, which is in the United States (Nevada), I admit that I was scared. The huge Cursed Castle, of dark colors, stood in front of me, such a monster ready to attack me. A small path sprinkled with red roses could lead us to the mansion. Around me, there were only trees. They seemed so menacing with their branches who flew away at the slightest breeze. Shaking, in spite of me, I moved slowly when it started to rain. There was no other shelter, and I was obliged to take refuge in the castle.
Inside, everything was covered in white and dusty sheets. We could see cobwebs here and there. Overhanging the whole hall, an enormous chandelier was producing dim light. Red roses were strewn on the ground forming a kind of way to follow. Curious, I followed these flowers. I had to climb the stairs before arriving in a corridor immersed in darkness. There were countless doors, all the same, in both rows. One of them was ajar. Suddenly, I heard a song so melodious and soothing that I forgot all fear and anxiety. As if I was going to be rescued. I smile blissfully. I hurried towards the open door. It will lead me nearby my savior. My sweetheart.
It was a kind of slope. I was running. Within a few minutes, I finally saw her. With her brown floating hair, her eyes full of love, her almost transparent complexion, she was perfect. She was my destiny, my love. She hadn't feet and was seeming to « float ». But, I closed my eyes to these details. After all, love is blind! She told me to approach. Until I was at the edge of the summit of the Cursed Castle.
All of a sudden, her eyes were transformed. Red, full of hatred.
A thunderstorm struck, in the sky.
I've found my senses, but too late.

Aaron K.

1816.

I loved Nael. He was good looking, he had a smile to die for. Poorer than me, I still loved him, wholeheartedly. But, he betrayed me. Betrayed with this pest, which is Sakira. He frequented me just because I was the daughter of the rich Hunter. He wanted my property, my money.
Sakira claimed her innocence and said that she didn't know anything about Nael's plans. But, he loved her. She couldn't live any longer.
Therefore, I killed them. Sakira, strangled to death and Nael, pushed from the summit of my castle.
Boys are all the same. Liars. Cowards.
On this, I'm going to suicide. I have no reason to remain alive.
I wanted to write these last lines in my personal diary because... because. Sometimes, there is simply no reason.

Eden H.

Sagot :

Until one day* si tu voulais dire "Avant le jour où"
whites and dusties cheets*
Après je vois pas d'autres fautes qui sautes aux yeux, mais fait toi relire par d'autres amis au cas où
Rihebr9
The ghost of the cursed castle reappeared. Indeed, the corpse of a young boy named Ezra was found at the foot of the haunted castle. Like all other boys in front of him, he "fell" from the top of the fortress. This is unlikely, since no companies there. Some people say that a ghost wanders there, and other rather think of suicide.I am neutral. Until one day, a friend of mine challenged me to visit the famous cursed castle. Like all boys, I wanted to prove my courage and bravery to friends. And I accepted the challenge with determination.When I arrived in front of the castle, which is the United States (Nevada), I acknowledge that I was afraid. The huge cursed castle, dark colors, stood in front of me like a monster ready to attack me. A small path strewn with red roses could lead us home. Around me there were only trees. They seemed so threatening to their branches flew away with the slightest breeze. Shaking, despite myself, I moved slowly when it started to rain. There was no other shelter, and I was obliged to take refuge in the castle.Inside, everything was covered in white sheets and dusty. We could see cobwebs here and there. Overlooking the whole room, a huge chandelier was low light output. Red roses were scattered on the ground forming a kind of path to follow. Curious, I followed these flowers. I had to climb stairs before arriving in a hallway in darkness. There were countless doors, still in both rows. One of them was ajar. Suddenly I heard a melodious and soothing song that I forgot all fear and anxiety. Like I should be saved. I blissfully mouse. I rushed to the open door. He will bring me near my savior. My heart.It was kind of slope. I was running. Within minutes, I finally screw. With its floating brown hair, eyes full of love, her almost transparent skin, she was perfect. It was my destiny, my love. She had no feet and was appearing to "float". But I closed my eyes to these details. After all, love is blind! She told me to approach. Until I was at the edge of the top of the cursed castle.Suddenly, his eyes were turned. Red, full of hate.A storm hit in the sky.I found my senses, but too late.
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